It Doesn't Get Better
by powergirl1729
Summary: He still couldn't understand why she left. And what did she mean by, "I don't want to ruin the relationship that you already have" Lomille/Kogan


_AN: This is an attempt to ward of a bad case of writers block. The prompt was: "You would have thought that would make it all better. But it didn't." I kind of wandered from the prompt, but whatever. Enjoy._

He'd said it. And he'd meant it too. That should have made it all better.

When did saying, "I love you", lose its meaning? When did getting down on one knee, not to propose but to beg, no longer stir her heart? When did sincere promises begin to sound like lies even to him?

She'd just walked away without so much as a backward glance. The only explanation that she'd given was a cryptic message. "I don't want to ruin the relationship that you already have"

What relationship? Camille had to know that it was her that he loved, and only her. Sure, he spent more time with the other members of Big Time Rush than he did with her, but that was healthy for a relationship.

Why was it when she left that she looked like she was the heartbroken one? Logan had desperately wanted to run after her and comfort her even though he was the one that had just been hurt. It wasn't fair that she got to play the sad one; he should be the one crying. And he was the one crying. Crying like a little girl, and he wasn't ashamed.

At least, he wasn't ashamed until he walked into the apartment and saw Kendall looking at him and he completely broke down. He couldn't even begin to straighten himself out or calm himself down. It wasn't fair that she'd left him and it was even less fair that he was getting that look of pity from Kendall. He didn't need pity. He didn't want pity from anyone, but for some reason with Kendall it just made him feel even more pathetic.

Logan forced himself to stand and walk, stumble out of the room, only to be interrupted by a strong hand on his arm. He pulled away violently saying, "Leave me alone"

Kendall refused to listen; he always refused to listen, and grabbed Logan's shoulders tightly. Logan fought back, but Kendall was stronger than him. He wrapped his arms around Logan and held him carefully.

Logan didn't want to give in. He wanted to fight Kendall off and cry by himself. He wanted to be alone. He felt weak for crying in front of Kendall.

Kendall didn't let go as Logan slowly began breaking down again. The brunette buried his face in the blonde's chest and continued crying. Kendall calmly stroked the other's hair and began whispering, "Don't worry, everything going to be OK."

Logan sobbed even harder when Kendall said that. It wouldn't get better. He'd have to see Camille every day. Every day he'd be reminded of how she'd just walked away. Did Kendall really expect him to just forget what had happened? Did he thinking that it would be easy to forget Camille?

As he stopped crying, Logan began to pull away, but Kendall pulled him back. The blonde rested his chin on the boy's head and said, "What happened?"

A small sob left Logan's lips, and he explained, "She left. She just left me. Why would she do that?"

"I'm sure that she had a reason", Kendall said quietly, "She's not a bad person. Did she say why?"

"She thought I was cheating", mutter Logan angrily, "Have I ever given her any reason to believe I was even interested in someone else? I've never even looked at other girls when I was dating her especially not when I was actually with her"

Kendall shifted uncomfortably as Logan spoke and the boy noticed. "Do you know what she was talking about?"

Kendall refused to look at Logan and it made the genius furious. He needed an explanation for Camille's statement and if Kendall knew than he had to speak up. Odd as it was that Kendall would know when he didn't, it wouldn't be without reason. Camille was friends with all the band members; she could have mentioned something to Kendall.

"What was she talking about?"

"I don't know", Kendall lied, "I mean I … I'm not sure. I think that I might possibly know one possible explanation that may or may not be true."

Logan waited patiently as Kendall let go of him and backed away. Kendall took several deep breaths and looked anywhere but at Logan. "I think that she was talking about…"

Kendall trailed off and grimaced saying, "I can't. It's probably not true anyway. I'm sorry"

He buried his head in his hands in shame and Logan felt even angrier at him. What would possibly make it so hard to explain? He grabbed Kendall arm saying firmly, "What. Was. She. Talking. About? It doesn't matter if it's probably not true. Just tell me"

Kendall swallowed heavily and whispered, "I think she was talking about me"

Logan let go of his arm feeling a bit relieved. That wasn't that bad. So it was that he'd been spending too much time with his friends. That wasn't too big of a deal. The relationship Camille had been referring to had merely been friendship. That would make it much easier to apologize for. He was about to smile and laugh about it with Kendall, but something in the blonde's eye made him pause.

"Why would she be so jealous of us, exactly?"

Kendall looked down and said, "It must be that you were spending so much time hanging. As I said, it was a stupid theory; it's probably not that at all"

Logan sighed and hugged Kendall warmly saying "Thanks for helping me calm down. All I need to do know it clean up and apologize to Camille tomorrow. I think I can get her back"

Kendall looked down again and nodded. Logan sensed something was off. Maybe it was because Kendall was still upset about Jo. It was a bit cruel to be rubbing his girlfriend, or soon-to-be-not-ex-girlfriend, in his friend's face when Jo was still halfway around to world.

Kendall looked up at Logan as tears welled in his eyes, but brushed them back effortlessly. "Yeah, you should do that."

Logan left the room to clean the tears and snot from his face and didn't hear Kendall saying, "She's jealous because I love you."

_AN: Reviews are like Christmas presents and are much appreciated. _


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